A Journey of Self-Discovery
Topics:
Session 20070426 (2255)
“A Journey of Self-Discovery”
“Reflecting and Feeding Energy”
Thursday, April 26, 2007 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Brenda (Leonora)
ELIAS: Good morning!
BRENDA: Good morning! (Elias chuckles) Good to hear your voice again.
ELIAS: And you also. And what shall we discuss?
BRENDA: Well, I have a few focus questions I was going to talk to you about, and then I wanted to talk with you about some of the movement or things happening in my life since we last spoke.
ELIAS: Very well.
BRENDA: Let’s do the focus questions. So, the first one’s really about my friend K./Geraldine. I wanted to know if you could tell me, I think she has what we would call a spirit or soul guide like Alaha is to me. Does she have someone that she has a connection with like that?
ELIAS: Yes.
BRENDA: Could you tell me that essence name?
ELIAS: (Pause) Essence name: Varisha (Var-EE-sha), V-A-R-I-S-H-A.
BRENDA: Varisha. Oh, thank you. Is there a recommendation you could give her about how she might best connect to this essence?
ELIAS: I would suggest either in dreams or in generating visualizations.
BRENDA: Is there anything that she would look for or notice in dreams?
ELIAS: Perhaps the imagery of either the form of a teacher or a creature.
BRENDA: Teacher or a creature. Okay. Great, thank you. She will appreciate that.
I have another focus question that may be related to Geraldine. When I was seventeen I was involved with a married man named Duke. I was wondering if he’s also a focus of Geraldine’s?
ELIAS: No. Counterpart.
BRENDA: Counterpart. Okay.
Has K., in this life—has she interacted with another focus of Leonora’s?
ELIAS: No.
BRENDA: Okay. I had a session recently with a shaman, and she connected with an essence of Leonora’s, another essence that she said had committed suicide, a young man in the 1920s. Is that an accurate assessment?
ELIAS: Yes.
BRENDA: How many of Leonora’s focuses have committed suicide? Can you tell me that?
ELIAS: (Pause) Approximately 56.
BRENDA: 56. Hm. Is that a high number, high proportion?
ELIAS: Not necessarily.
BRENDA: Not necessarily. Okay.
I had a dream last night about Napoleon, and I don’t remember much about it except for I believe the character I was in the dream had a relationship with Napoleon. Is that imagery related to a focus of Leonora's?
ELIAS: Yes.
BRENDA: That she had a focus related to Napoleon?
ELIAS: Not as a relative, but as an individual that was known to that individual.
BRENDA: Was there a purpose for me having that dream imagery?
ELIAS: Yes. That was imagery that you presented to yourself in supportiveness of yourself, for the individual in that focus is quite independent and generates a significant expression of their own strength and confidence. And that imagery was a presentment to you in encouragement in YOUR movement.
BRENDA: Can you tell me what that focus’s name was?
ELIAS: Shall you not investigate?
BRENDA: (Laughs) Can you tell me the gender?
ELIAS: (Laughs) The gender is male.
BRENDA: Male. Okay. I will investigate. Are you going to tell me anything else about this male?
ELIAS: (Laughs) I shall allow you to discover, and you can express to myself who it is.
BRENDA: Ah. All right. It’s going to be that way. (Both laugh) Okay.
I’ve also had a lot of dream imagery in the past few months with Viggo Mortensen, which I know Leonora has a counterpart, or my focus is counterpart, and I wondered what other kinds of relationships Leonora and the essence Shanta have? Do they have other kinds of relationships, or is counterpart action common between those two?
ELIAS: Yes, and you also incorporate other focuses in which you generate relationships in different capacities.
BRENDA: Okay. Are they what we would call soulmates?
ELIAS: Yes.
BRENDA: Yes. Okay. How many focuses have they had together?
ELIAS: (Pause) 152.
BRENDA: 152. Okay. It’s curious. Well, he has appeared in my dreams a lot and it’s always very comforting, I guess, supportive to see him there.
How many focuses do my son Zack and I—how many have Leonora and Kareem shared?
ELIAS: (Pause) 126.
BRENDA: 126. Oh. Okay. Well, that’s it for them. So, we’re just doing a thirty-minute session today, so that’s all the focus questions I’m going to ask.
I wanted to have a check-in with you about some… I think it’s movement. It’s hard to characterize what the last three months have been in my life since we spoke last and just wanted to see. I don’t even know what the questions are for sure; I just assumed that we would come up with them. At the time I made the appointment I was in a different space than I am now, and it almost seems like… I don’t know. It’s one of those when you’re in such different places, like okay, who was I then and who am I now? Is that true? Have I been going through some movement in the past few months?
ELIAS: Quite so, which is obvious. And in this, you are embarking upon a new journey and discovering new elements of yourself and generating experiences of being more directing of yourself, which I am acknowledging of.
BRENDA: Yeah. I can… It’s been kind of a wild ride, and it hasn’t exactly unfolded the way I think maybe I had expectations. Like I did formally, legally separate from my husband and move to Vermont and lived with K. for a few months, and I guess I learned a lot about myself and how I am in relationships. I learned a lot about how I had been in the relationship with my husband. I saw a lot of things that I hadn’t seen, a lot of actually in the relationship. And so it just seemed like I was just really learning a lot about myself, but it also seemed like I got to the point where I could not commit to be in a relationship with K., which was very disturbing to her. She said she could just literally sense me putting up a wall and disconnecting from her. And I had the opportunity to reconnect with my husband, who has also gone through, I think, some changes, and I found myself just feeling like I needed to be alone and to be sort of in a relationship with myself. Is that an accurate assessment?
ELIAS: Yes. I would quite agree.
BRENDA: Okay. (Laughs) Which is… I don’t know. I had seen these—you know, I have just always had a relationship with a significant other, for instance, since I was a very young woman, and never really just had a time just to be in a relationship without those external connections. So it’s different, but it does feel like I am more allowing myself to do things that I probably would have been afraid of or put off by before.
ELIAS: Yes, I would agree, and I am acknowledging of you that you have also allowed yourself to move through some significant elements of fear.
BRENDA: Yeah. Fear and doubt, I think. I don’t know, I guess you were aware when I was in Vermont there was some pretty significant, pretty intense – I'm not sure it was really significant, it was intense to me – periods of fear and doubt, but somehow I came through that.
ELIAS: Yes. And this is the beginning of your new journey in allowing yourself to be more directing of yourself, allowing yourself to discover more of what your preferences are and what they are not, and more of an allowance of yourself in your own freedom. This is a journey of self-discovery.
BRENDA: Yeah. It’s curious. I’m back in Texas, which is my home, which I don’t feel very connected to spiritually and just as a sense of place, but it’s curious that I’m going to be living with my sister for a while, with Linda/Ruthanna, and it feels like that maybe there was a purpose in coming back here to… I don’t know, just to discover more about those connections. I also have a sense that it’s temporary.
ELIAS: Yes, I would agree.
BRENDA: You would agree?
ELIAS: Yes. (Pause)
BRENDA: Okay. I’ve also been reading and really I think understanding a lot more about energy, related to the discussion that you did on St. Patrick’s Day with the leprechaun (Elias chuckles) [1] and some other information I’ve been getting from different books that I attracted to myself at the same time. And it seems like I’m starting to understand that and experimenting with that a little bit. Is that correct?
ELIAS: Yes. I would also agree.
BRENDA: Mm. I think it’s… I don't know, it just seems very, very significant.
I guess I wanted to know about the bread making and the path I was on—or I think I’m still on with that—and my exploration of myself. Do you have any recommendations for things that I should… actions or anything?
ELIAS: I would express to you that in this new direction and discovery that you are engaging, it may be significant for you to be experimenting with genuinely being directing of yourself, and in that, identifying what you want – which, in some areas, you have. And in that, pay attention to your energy. Experience yourself BEING what you want now and not expressing a waiting. But even if you are not actually physically engaging what you want in certain directions, such as your bread making, you can begin now to experience yourself in that position and in that role now, which will project a type of energy which will allow you to actually create that more easily. And in this, recognize that all that you do is interconnected. Therefore, if you are allowing yourself to experience fulfillment and abundance in other directions, that will also interconnect with your want to be engaging this type of an avenue in a career, so to speak.
In this, you can be acknowledging and appreciating your value and your abundance in the relationships that you have, and credit yourself with your participation in them and your creation of them. And you can appreciate and experience your talents in sharing with the other individuals around you, such as sharing your abilities and your creativity in this bread making with your sibling.
BRENDA: We are looking forward to that. (Elias laughs) [Inaudible] like I’m always continuing to bake the breads, and it felt like—it just felt natural to keep doing it even when I’m not doing it in a job capacity. Sometimes I forget about the interconnection between the elements of my relationships.
I was curious about something that happened when I was leaving for Vermont, a few days before that. My husband and I got into a violent encounter, which we’ve had some pretty intense arguments where he’s really been in my face, but this was—well, he physically choked me and hurt my hand. And I know it was related to my energy too. And I still feel the pain in the joints where he hurt my finger. And I've tried to understand what was happening, what we were doing between the two of us. Can you explain that some to me?
ELIAS: Yes. Now; first of all, remember that you are engaging another individual, therefore although you are not co-creating, you are participating with another energy. And in this, you draw to yourself experiences and individuals in each moment that are very precise, and that will reflect what you are expressing.
Now; when I express reflect, that is not a mirror. Let me express to you in this manner that it may be clear. When you gaze into a mirror, you see an identical reflection of yourself. You see that mirroring of yourself. When you gaze into a pond, you may see a reflection of yourself but it will not be identical, for it may be somewhat fragmented, for the water moves. It is not stationary, and therefore the image moves.
In this, a reflection is not a mirror. In this particular situation, you were both reflecting, and in that, you were, in a manner of speaking, feeding each other’s energy. You were generating different expressions within yourselves, but in the projection of energy each of you were precisely creating that draw of what you were projecting.
In a manner of speaking, your energy, as I have expressed recently, can be likened to an immense magnet which surrounds you. And that magnet pulls in every direction, and what it pulls is whatever will match what is being projected.
In this situation, the other individual was experiencing tremendous frustration, and in that was expressing an outward generating of that frustration in physical manners, and you were generating fear and defence. The combination of these types of energy can be very explosive, especially if they are being expressed in intensity. In the intensity of your defence—which remember, that is an opposing energy—
BRENDA: Correct.
ELIAS: That created an encouragement for his frustration. And his frustration created an encouragement for your defence. And in combining the two, it becomes explosive.
But it is also a significant example to you in how powerful energy can be, and how strongly and how immediately your energy pulls to you experiences that match it.
In this, it is also an illustration to you to be aware of what type of energy you are projecting and to be directing of that, and how strongly defence can create many experiences that you do not like and that you do not want and that may be quite uncomfortable.
BRENDA: Yeah.
ELIAS: Therefore, at times individuals generate significantly uncomfortable experiences as an example and to remind them of how they are projecting their energy, and that if your energy is strong enough to create that type of intensity in discomfort, it is equally that strong—or stronger—to be creating experiences that you appreciate and that you DO want to engage.
BRENDA: I can see all of that that you said. And I think even before it happened, I might have had some sense or some knowing that my energy was doing something, and—
ELIAS: Yes. And this is significant also. And it is significant for you to remember and acknowledge that, for I will express to you, as I have with other individuals, you actually are aware of more and know more than you think you do.
BRENDA: Yeah. And sometimes it’s just finding that spot in your mind where you actually pay attention to those things that you know. And I think I did know that. And now looking back, understanding this a little better, I can look back at some of the other interactions that C. and I’ve had that were similar, not as physically expressed, but certainly they exploded with that same intensity. And each time, you’re right, I was being defensive and was offering the opposing energy. And it’s kind of remarkable to see how that works.
ELIAS: Defensiveness can be—
BRENDA: And he and I have talked about it some, too. Has he been through some changes too since we separated?
ELIAS: Yes.
BRENDA: Well, he still has a lot of resistance to you. I try to avoid Elias in our conversations. He’s (Elias laughs) very suspicious of certain things, but…
Anyway, we are out of time. I will do a longer session soon. I feel like I’m in a much, much different place than when I scheduled it, but it’s so good to hear your voice.
ELIAS: (Laughs) And you also. And I would express an acknowledgement to you, for in this different space, as you term it, you are generating much more ease.
BRENDA: It feels like it, it does. And it feels like I’m much more allowing, maybe, of things.
ELIAS: Yes. I would agree. And that is to be acknowledged.
BRENDA: Thank you. I appreciate that. (Both laugh) I also appreciate your supportiveness through the other episodes when I wasn’t feeling so strong, when I was feeling those fears and doubts. I know your energy was there, so I am very much appreciative of that.
ELIAS: You are very welcome, my friend. To you in dear friendship, in great encouragement and in tremendous lovingness, au revoir.
BRENDA: Au revoir. Thank you.
[1] Session 2227
(Elias departs after 33 minutes)
Copyright 2007 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.