Monday, July 16, 2001 (Private/Phone)
Participants: Mary (Michael) and Letty (Castille)
Elias arrives at 10:30 AM. (Arrival time is 32 seconds.)
ELIAS: Good morning!
LETTY: Good morning, Elias! How are you today?
ELIAS: As always, and yourself?
LETTY: I'm doing better! I'm doing well. Interestingly enough, I thought I was going to have a session with you last week and things just kind of went 180 degrees. (Elias chuckles) Things have changed, but I think things have moved into more clarity for me. So more than asking questions today, I want some validation.
ELIAS: Very well.
LETTY: One of them that I have forgotten to ask you about in previous sessions is that I guess I could call myself clumsy if I wanted to, give myself that label, because I'm always tripping or dropping or hitting. I really have never paid attention to the imagery until very recently as to why I was doing this. What I came up with this week is that it is when I am discounting myself, and it's kind of like a subtle moment for me to pay attention that I am discounting of myself.
ELIAS: Correct.
LETTY: Wow! That was great, because I had no clue before this week. (Elias chuckles)
My next one is a little bit more complicated in the sense that it has to do with Leezar, although not necessarily with Leezar himself but with what's happening with myself. I read a wonderful transcript yesterday where you were talking to somebody about having suspicion of your inner voice, your intuition. For a while there I was having problems like is it my intuition, or is my head and my belief systems?
I've been back and forth about breaking this relationship, letting it go, remembering there's no absolutes but then coming back to I don't want this, this is my choice, I'm not sure. I've been feeling like a little yo-yo within myself. I've read that first of all your desire follows your intent, and I know it has to do with my intent and all these relationships, not only intimate like with Leezar, but with Cindel and Marta and other friends that I have.
I realized where I wasn't quite paying attention is that I was lacking in trust in myself and knowing my abilities; so therefore it's like trying to flip a coin and decide which is what I really desire and not being able to pick it up. So does this have to do with... (Pause) I'm not sure what I'm trying to ask or say, Elias! (Both laugh) I guess I do sound confused, and that is my question. I was completely lost until last night when I picked up a little bit that I do think it has to do with doubting myself.
ELIAS: In actuality, what you are experiencing is another aspect of movement into familiarity of self. In this, as you continue to be turning your attention to self, you move your attention into different layers of self.
Now; in the movement into different layers of yourself, at times there may be experienced some confusion, for you are beginning to turn your attention to aspects of yourself that have been expressed continuously throughout your focus but that you have offered little attention to, for you direct your attention to specific expressions of yourself.
What I am expressing to you is the identification that the most familiar expressions that you offer attention to are those of emotions, thought, and information that you offer to yourself through sense data. These expressions that you create are the most familiar and hold your attention most strongly.
The interpretations and translations of thought are VERY strongly aligned with. Many times they are also, in a manner of speaking, mis-defined, but nevertheless you pay close attention to the activity of thought.
Now; in this movement in creating more of an intimacy in relationship with self and allowing yourself to turn your attention to different aspects of yourself and different expressions of yourself, thought does not always accurately interpret or define other expressions of yourself.
Now; let me express to you, I have been expressing to individuals for quite some time framework to be paying attention to self, to be noticing expressions, choices, lack of choices, creations, behaviors, and motivations within self. The interpretation of what I am expressing to you all in these words, so to speak, is objectively received and translated by all of you in a manner in which you thusly focus your attention more intensely upon the expression of thought.
In the incorporation of information that I have offered recently concerning emotion as a communication, you are also directing your attention more intensely to emotion in a different manner than you have expressed previously; but in actuality these two expressions that you all create within this physical dimension have held the most significant expression of your attention throughout your focuses. You are merely intensifying the expression of that attention now, [in] which you are beginning to allow yourselves to notice the inconsistency of thought in relation to other aspects of yourself that engage action, and that aspect of yourself that actually engages the action of choice.
Now; in this, what you begin noticing is the difference of your thought processes and your actions; but you incorporate confusion, for although you are beginning movement in noticing and recognizing that there is another expression, another aspect of yourself that you create that is not identified with thought or sense data or emotional communication which actually creates choice and therefore moves you into action, you are not quite familiar with this aspect of yourselves yet, and therefore it remains undefined within you. You are merely noticing that there is some "thing" or part of you that moves you into actual action and choice, and that this part, so to speak, of you is not necessarily associated with the familiar parts of you that you have been paying attention to.
Example: you engage a thought process within any particular moment and within your thoughts you define to yourself a want, but you create an action that may not be in alignment with your thoughts. Subsequently, you are confused and questioning yourself and discounting yourself, for you notice objectively that your thoughts have expressed to you a want and you have created a different action.
Now; this is the actualization of what I have been expressing to you all for much time framework. You are now beginning a noticing of HOW you actually create your reality, and you are now beginning to assimilate and incorporate this information more accurately, and [are] allowing yourselves to pay attention and redefine your terms, your associations, and therefore your reality. What you are moving yourselves into now is a redefining of your association with thought.
I have expressed the information to you previously, offering you the definition of the movement of thought - what you have created thought to do, so to speak. It is a tool. Although thought is energy and it is a reality, thought does not generate your movement.
Thought is a tool that you have designed within this physical dimension to be interpreting your movement and objectively translating to you what you are creating; but you have incorporated your attention so strongly in relation to thought that you have altered its function - although in actuality you have not altered its function, and this is the reason that it becomes confusing. You have altered your association with its function and your definition of its function, but its function in itself remains the same. Therefore, there are inconsistencies that occur, and you become confused in holding your attention upon thought.
In examining the example, once again, of incorporating thought which expresses an identification of a want but noticing an action that appears to you to be contrary to the thought and therefore incorporating confusion, what you actually create in thought is, in a manner of speaking, an objective search through self which attempts to identify and translate input of actions and communications that you are expressing to yourself in any particular moment; and in its translation, it is not an absolute. In a manner of speaking, in your terms, the thought is actually a type of interpreted guess in relation to what you are actually creating in any particular moment.
Now; the reason that the thought moves in the direction many times of being an interpretive guess is that your attention is focused upon thought to such an extreme that you do not allow your attention to be engaged with recognizing and noticing other avenues of communication and action that you are engaging within the moment. Therefore, the attention is not providing the thought with adequate or accurate information, for your attention is offering information to the mechanism of your thought process.
Now; as I have stated many times previously, your attention is associated also with your concentration, and concentration is not the expression of thought or thinking. In this, what partially is expressed in your attention, in relation to offering information to your thoughts, is the concentration which is expressed in relation to your beliefs; but there are other movements that are also occurring.
As I have stated previously, there are some expressions of yourselves in this physical dimension that move independently of your beliefs. I am recognizing that this once again may incorporate confusion with many individuals. I shall state in this now, once again, the reinforcement that beliefs in themselves are neutral, and the point is not to be reinforcing automatic responses and lack of choice in relation to beliefs by viewing them as bad or good or [as] aspects of your physical reality that must be eliminated; and I may express to you presently in what I am expressing to you now, within your objective associations this may be automatically allowing a leeway, so to speak, in an underlying association concerning the elimination of beliefs.
Regardless, I shall express to you, in actuality there are some aspects of yourselves in the design of your physical focuses that move independently of your beliefs but they are also indirectly influenced, for directly or indirectly your beliefs systems are an intricate design of your reality, and therefore they are quite influencing.
In this, what you are beginning to allow yourself to view and to become familiar with is one of these aspects of yourself and your reality that is actually independent of your beliefs. This, as I have expressed to Cindel recently, may be temporarily identified as that aspect of yourself that is the action/choice creating expression of yourself, and this choice-expressing aspect of yourself does not always move in conjunction with your thoughts. Your thoughts are not directing of it. This movement of yourself may create choice in relation to or within an accurate interpretation of your thoughts or it may not. Your thoughts are not directing of this choice/action aspect of yourself; your thoughts are an interpreting/translating mechanism that is attempting to be objectively expressing to you an identification of what you are creating.
Now; as you move into new areas of awareness of self, you begin noticing the inaccuracy of thought at times and the lack of absoluteness of thought.
This choosing aspect of you moves automatically with whatever direction you are engaging within any particular moment or time framework. It follows the direction of your attention. It moves independent of your beliefs, and therefore is unconcerned with the expression of duplicity. This is the reason that within any particular moment you may move your attention to your thoughts, but your thoughts are quite influenced by your beliefs; and your thoughts being influenced by your beliefs also translate those beliefs - as they are all coupled with duplicity - through an expression of duplicity.
The choice/action expression of yourself is not concerned with the expressions of beliefs or duplicity. It is merely following the direction of your attention. It does not judge. Therefore, this aspect of yourself genuinely expresses, "It matters not; you are merely creating a choice." The choice may be comfortable or it may not be comfortable. It matters not, for the identification of comfortable or uncomfortable, good/bad, right/wrong, are all created in relation to thought, which is influenced by duplicity.
Therefore, the thought is a subsequent action; the direction is already engaged. The thought is a subsequent action that is created to be translating the actions and the direction that you engage. This is what you are beginning movement into now, recognizing this element of yourself that chooses, that creates action.
Now; in this also I may express to you, I have offered information to you all previously that you turn your attention to be examining your motivations, to be paying attention to the avenues of communication that you offer to yourselves, for these may be translated through thought but they are not created by thought. Allowing yourself to pay attention and notice these expressions of self offers you information in relation to this aspect of yourself that you are now beginning to glimpse.
LETTY: I think I was communicating to myself through some dreams.
ELIAS: Yes.
LETTY: I was going to ask you about those. Actually, it was one of those that I had a couple within one night. I don't pay attention very often to whether it's colored or black and white, but this one was very defined as black and white, and I felt I was going into an out-of-body. I started to feel that I was flying over a room, but something in me scared me and forced me to wake up. Was I moving into an actual out-of-body experience?
ELIAS: This, in actuality, is symbology that you have offered to yourself in relation to this discussion this day. For what you have presented to yourself is an allowance to be engaging an alternate self and alternate reality. This quite commonly is expressed in individuals' experiences in the lack of color, which is a defining expression in your associations to allow you the recognition that you are engaging an alternate self.
In this, your symbology to yourself is the unfamiliarity of alternate selves but the recognition objectively of the existence, so to speak, and the reality of alternate selves, knowing that these are all aspects of you. This is presented to you within your imagery to allow you the recognition of the unfamiliarity of this aspect of yourselves that is continuously active in your objective expression and experience within the entirety of your physical focus, this aspect of yourself that is the choice/action aspect.
LETTY: Now it makes more sense, because I had a dream that I just could not figure out. There were tornados, many, many tornadoes around the house, and I could see them through the window but inside it was all calm. So, was this also communication to myself? I mean, I am feeling the tornadoes outside sometimes, but really there's nothing ... you know, of faith?
ELIAS: Correct.
LETTY: Of course, I choose to communicate to me about duplicity, I think. I had a dream last week: first of all I was swimming in a very shallow pool with all these Persians, I don't know why but Persians who did not swim, and somehow we all had to get out of the pool. Before we got out of the pool, I decided to swim underwater, which I usually don't do because the water bothers my ears, but it was just very clear. I could see so clear underneath and the swim was just flowing very smoothly, which to me was like that part of me that is still moving in a very comfortable flowing easy way, I guess, verses the outside which was a little bit confusing and doubtingness.
Very interesting, that same night I had a dream about my family. We were visiting my father's family, and at one point he didn't care very much for my stepmother. What was unusual for me, I was befriending her. She was being criticized, and so the way I read it is self-awareness of myself of the duplicity that is going on within me right now.
ELIAS: Correct, and also presenting to yourself imagery concerning what you view to be outside movement and the association with unpredictability in your beliefs, and the calm and ease of movement inwardly. This is expressed in your dream imagery of the water.
LETTY: So, Elias, do you have any advice? (Elias laughs) This is not a crystal ball question, just advice on how ... I mean, I'm excited because I'm understanding what's going through me, but I don't necessarily like it. (Laughs) Maybe because it is ... you're right, it's very unfamiliar, and I guess I've always known where I was going or what I was doing, because I did make things absolute. So it's just kind of like allowing it?
ELIAS: Yes.
LETTY: So I can become familiar with me?
ELIAS: Yes. Now; in relation to your objective expression and situation that you have created, this offers you an opportunity to genuinely be paying attention to what you are expressing within self. Allow yourself to be recognizing you are creating choices, Castille. In relation to your expression of relationship with Leezar, it is not a question of right or wrong, or better or worse. This is the involvement of the translation of your thoughts.
LETTY: Right.
ELIAS: You ARE choosing movement. You are merely confusing yourself within your THINKING concerning your choices. Your choices are reflecting "it matters not."
LETTY: Okay, I've got to stop thinking so much! (Elias chuckles) This is part of what you've told me before, that I also analyze too much, like Larkshire.
ELIAS: Correct.
LETTY: I'll remember that, then. Well, I wish you had a little crystal ball! (Both laugh) I know it is an adventure; it's an adventure.
ELIAS: In relation to your inquiry with crystal ball, express to myself presently, Castille, what is the identification of your emotional communication which is identifying what you are choosing and what you are doing? (Pause)
LETTY: Well, I know I am allowing. And my choice, I do believe that my choice is it matters not in the objective imagery. Although I do, going back to the familiar, enjoy even if you call it a challenge to be with Leezar. I think that's part of the problem that I have, because I do still see myself in Portland, and there are other times that I don't want to deal with it. So that's why I was hoping you had a crystal ball, because then I would know. See, when you tell me that, I do understand when you say that I am choosing and I am moving. I guess I'm not seeing it objectively, or maybe I am and I'm not accepting it.
ELIAS: You ARE viewing objectively, but you are also allowing your thoughts to be interruptive in your attention and projecting futurely, and [are] expecting to be creating an absolute in answer to yourself in your concern of future.
LETTY: Yes, I have expectations! (Laughs)
ELIAS: Correct! Therefore, what I am expressing to you is that the projection of your attention in thought into the future matters not. What holds significance is that you pay attention to what you are choosing and creating now, and allow yourself to relax your energy in that expression.
LETTY: That's what I wanted. That's the phrase I was looking for, "relax my energy." I wasn't sure how to do that.
ELIAS: By accepting what you are choosing and creating NOW, for there are no absolutes, Castille. What you choose now is what you choose now, and this is not the prerequisite of what you may choose within the future.
LETTY: I know that so well, but the assimilation of it ... but I think today, I'm going to have to listen to you, this tape, many, many times. I think I did get the gist of where my confusion has been.
ELIAS: Very well.
LETTY: I'll try to feel more or pay more attention to my emotional communication than to my thoughts.
ELIAS: And also to the expression of what you are actually choosing.
LETTY: Well, Elias, I've got five more minutes, and this is a quick question that I always wanted to ask of you. It has to do with my anxiety when I am in total darkness. I mean, it could be like somebody putting something over my eyes, and I have an anxiety of being in a very dark, dark room. I haven't been able to pick up whether it has to do with another focus or not, but...
ELIAS: No, this is directly associated with your alignment with the expression of control and the lack of control.
LETTY: Wow! Therefore, if I can't see, I cannot control.
ELIAS: Correct, and therefore if you are not expressing control, you also automatically associate the lack of control with fear that some expression of harmfulness may be occurring.
LETTY: Very interesting, okay. I do feel a lot better about that I would never ... there's nothing for me to fear.
ELIAS: Correct.
LETTY: Well, Elias, always in tremendous appreciation.
ELIAS: You are quite welcome, my friend. You incorporate much to assimilate.
LETTY: Yes, I think I'm going to be calling you back for a refresher course.
ELIAS: (Laughing) And I am always available to you, Castille.
LETTY: I know. (Elias laughs) Are we communicating pretty well? Am I picking up ... I know you read me better than I do, but I ... when we speak through my smoke detector?
ELIAS: Ha ha ha ha ha! Offering you the reinforcement of my presence. (Chuckling)
LETTY: Okay, thank you.
ELIAS: You are welcome. I express, as always, great affection to you, Castille, and anticipate our next meeting.
LETTY: Oh, me too. Thank you.
ELIAS: To you, in tremendous affection and encouragement, au revoir.
LETTY: Au revoir.
Elias departs at 11:28 AM.
©2002 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved
Copyright 2001 Mary Ennis, All Rights Reserved.